A March 22nd update.
So, after repeated spankings by strangers and friends, I am forced to admit something.
I am starting to like Faith.
It started out like most of my relationships. I said I wanted to be friends, but I was stand-offish, unable to commit to any sort of real give and take. She’d take my hand in the car; a nervous giggle would escape. And I’d tell my friends she was “lame” so they wouldn’t make fun of me.
I started thinking, “I wonder if she likes me?”
Then the outfits, the dressing for her, the convenient trips to the store when she was on air. My boyfriend liking her more than me, then me listening to all her podcasts, trying to figure out why, and realizing I liked her more. And more than that, she liked me. I could tell.
Fine. I like her. She’s smart and silly and she seems to have no trouble being herself on the radio.
I am keeping the post below to remind me of how the denial of feelings can really make you say clever things but ultimately you can’t deny the truth.
See you on the radio, baby.
There was a time I was over at my friend C.’s house and her kid, a wee lad of somewhere under a year took a HUGE crap and as she was changing his 5 pound diaper she exclaimed, “Look What YOU Did!”
It was then that I knew we couldn’t be friends anymore. While everyone has of course taken a crap that gives you an odd sense of pride and accomplishment, we don’t applaud craps in others. Bodily functions shouldn’t be lauded unless having them constitutes a great triumph over an injury between L4 and L5.
So I naturally grimace when Faith “kind of a Matisse” Salie says it to her guests when they are witty, or funny. It is her positive reinforcement of the emo elite that has me on the fence regarding this NPR newbie. Ira Glass laughs when it is funny, and he has that charming way of reminding the guest how funny, and sad, and then sadly funny, everything is. Except of course when Sarah Vowell shows up. Nobody makes Sarah laugh except Sarah.
Look, I’m as happy as the next Grup when someone shows up who is as interested as I am in how the hell the lead singer of Silversun Pickups is a dude. But something about Faith makes me think we will never be friends. She’s gonna SAY she wants to go out and get margaritas and hit on guys who we will never take home because we are all in committed relationships and we are just doing it for the ego boost. But she’s secretly figuring out how to get her boyfriend to marry her, buy a townhouse in North Jersey and if she can name her kids Logan and Rory without anyone guessing she’s name checking a show on the CW.
I think I just can’t accept that anyone working for NPR/APM would have a french manicure. And I think she does. Call me old fashioned but NPR is for people like Nic Harcout who sounds like he should look like Ralph Fiennes but really looks like Joseph.