From The Way Back Machine August 2003

19 May

I am so fucking hopeful and innocent:

August 25, 2003 – 8:50 a.m.

Yeah, I know, I should be working… but there are some things to say.

First, I got this very sweet Friendster message from a guy, who seems smart and nice and of course, I went to his page to see his picture which was, at least on the front page, a mentally handicapped kid running in the Special Olympics. Now, I went to see all the photos and his real picture is in there and he is clearly not the mentally handicapped kid running in the Special Olympics. So it kind of begs the question — what does this mean? I mean, I am not saying I don’t do a wicked ‘special’ impersonation and that I don’t fear God’s wrath everytime I do it, but still — do we think that he has put this particular picture up to drive traffic towards himself or away? Is it ironic? Can mentally or physically people be ironic symbols in anyway? Is this just a problem because I ran out of Hazelnut creamer for my coffee and am forced to use half and half and sugar?

I saw an amazing movie (well, the last 2/3rds, anyway) called “From The Terrace” which starred Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward. First of all, they were so unbelievably beautiful, both of them, that it kills me to watch it. But it also made me think of another, more modern on-screen couple — Ben and Jen. And the thing I realized about Paul and Joanne vs. Ben and Jen is the fact that the former never referenced their fame in their performances, while the later seem to commenting in this annoying post modern way on their own fame in every movie. In a way (though I love them) Hepburn and Tracy are much closer to the loathsome Ben and Jen — when we watch their movies we see them through the lens of the affair that they had. I don’t know, maybe I shouldn’t worry about those crazy kids.

Finally, a little note about giving advice. I spend every day struggling with my own career and yet I keep getting requests to help this person or that person with their career. Now, I always say yes, because I think it is good karma, but I still feel like “hey, wait a second, who the hell is gonna help me? who is out there for me to call? huh? who?”

But then again, I haven’t had coffee yet, so maybe I should shut up.

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